Top 10 Ways to Spice Up Your Sex Life

There’s nothing wrong with a little predictability. In fact, that’s part of the reason people love being in relationships to begin with. When you can just sit back, relax, and be yourself with another person, it’s the absolute best.

But sometimes, things can get a little stale. When you already know all the moves, it’s pretty easy to keep falling into the same patterns. That’s when predictability…becomes a rut.

But there’s good news! There are simple ways that you and your partner can spice up your sex life. Small and easy things you can try to take your bedroom romps from mild to wild.

These are the top 10 ways to spice up your sex life.

Set the Stage

Make your night of fun an event. 

Grab some candles, dim the lights, and find something soft and moody on Spotify.

You know how they say “making love” is a very specific kind of sex? Well that’s the kind of sex we’re aiming for here. Put a little romance back into your monotony.

Change Location

An easy way to spice things up is buck your usual habits. Ditch the bedroom, loosen those inhibitions, and find a new spot to do the deed. Changing locations will open your mind to new possibilities as you find the most comfortable position on the washing machine, learn the wonders of counter-height oral favors, or even take it to the backyard for some late night shenanigans.

Change Position

Second verse – same as the first! Habits are fantastic because they foster comfort and reliability…but they also breed “boring.” So, along with your new location, find a new position or three! There are mountains of books and online resources that can help you discover a new sexual perspective, and bring something new to the table.

If only you had a well-written and sharp-witted blog (staffed by incredibly smart and good looking writers) to turn to for mountains of position suggestions to fit any and every mood.

Open Up The Toy Box

This may seem a little obvious, coming from a sex toy company, but sex toys are a GREAT way to add that little x-factor into your evening and make things a whole lot spicier. Whether you’re looking to incorporate a clitoral vibrator into sex, sliding a c-ring onto a partner or dildo, or even seeking out something a little kinkier, sex toys can add a whole new dimension of pleasure to even the most mundane of sex sessions.

Send A Sext

Many people underestimate the power of words. Just like there are those who don’t think a book can truly be “scary,” there are those out there (who clearly lack an imagination) who feel that no book can possibly be “sexy.” 

Well, as any reader of Fifty Shades of Grey can tell you – those people are dead wrong.

Words can be sexy af, and getting a random text from your partner in the middle of the work day intimately describing what they plan to do to you once you get home…well, you may need to take a long lunch. Texting a few sexy messages or racy pics is a great way to build anticipation for an evening of fun. Plus, we all know how much easier it is to say something difficult through text rather than on the phone or face-to-face. Well, the same is true for spicy stuff too! It’s a lot easier to text, “I’m gonna suck the soul out of you” than it is to say it in person without laughing a little.

Slow It Down

When you’ve done something over and over again, it’s super easy to fall into the same cycles and patterns. After all – you already know what works, and if it ain’t broke…

But just because something isn’t broken, doesn’t mean it can’t be better! After all, you’re reading this because you’re looking for ways to spice things up! 

So slow. Things. Down. Focus on foreplay and finding ways to please your partner with just your hands and mouth. Teasing and anticipation are fantastic ways to create more sexual tension and build up that excitement. Set a timer if you have to so you have a literal countdown clock ‘til you can take things to the next level. Even set multiple timers! Start with just your hands, focusing on sensual touch and eye contact. Once that timer goes off, add your mouths in and keep building that anticipation.

Speed It Up

On the opposite end of the spectrum, maybe a little spur-of-the-moment action is where it’s at. Gotta leave to make a dinner reservation? Are guests stopping by? Do you need to jump on a Zoom call in a few minutes? Surprise your partner with a quickie. The heightened urgency will add a little extra excitement and zest to the process – and they’ll be thinking about it for the whole rest of the day.

Gamify Your Pleasure

What about a little direction? There are lots of sex games out there that are ready and willing to help you turn up the heat on all your naughty interactions. Some use cards to direct you and your partner in what you should each do next, while others might use a roll of the dice to tell you just what part of your partner’s body to please next. The unpredictability and “follow the rules” mindset of a sex game are the perfect way to try new things and ease you out of your sexual routine.

Or you could go a totally different direction and take it old school: the quiet game. Silent foreplay. First one to make a sound has to please the other to completion. Do you let things happen naturally…or try to make them moan with pleasure? The fun is in the strategy.

Take On A New Role

This one may be a little cliché, but clichés are clichés for a reason! Roleplay is a fun, sexy, and sometimes silly way to have more fun in the bedroom! 

You’re probably thinking about French maid outfits and pizza delivery guys – and if that sounds fun, try it! – but there’s so much more to roleplay than ridiculous porn-y scenarios.

While being kink-shy is completely understandable, you can still explore a subordinate/dominant relationship through a less kinky lens. Take command of the bedroom, and tell your partner what you want them to do next. The sounds you make will be their reward.

Or maybe you want to be the one being controlled? Let your partner control you – fully. Let them grab you, turn you, move you however they wish. Give in to their pleasure by letting them do exactly what they want to you. You might find you like being under their sway.

Of course, in all these scenarios, trust is essential. But as long as you both feel comfortable, there’s no reason not to give in…and let go.

Put On A Show

When we think of masturbation, we always tend to think of it as a solo affair – but it doesn’t have to be. Pleasing yourself in front of your partner can be the perfect thing to turn you both on. Even though we live in the 21st century, sex is still taboo in so many ways! The “danger” and naughtiness of watching your partner pleasure themselves can be the hottest thing in the world. They know what they want, they’re taking it, and no one can stop them.

Watching your partner take their pleasure into their own hands can also be an incredible learning opportunity. After all, who knows what we like better than us? If you’re missing an important part of your partner’s pleasure, or they didn’t realize how sensitive that certain other part of you actually is – then there’s a whole new dimension of sex that you’ve just unlocked.

Take these tips and run with them. There are so many exciting and sexy ways to add a little flair into your sex life, that we couldn’t possibly list them all here. Above all, remember: Sex is supposed to be fun. Laughter and light-heartedness always have a place in the bedroom. It can help you get comfortable and loosen up.

And that’s when things get wild.