Strap on for Beginners: A First Timer's Guide

82% of couples polled noted that they try to work as hard to possible to keep their sex life vibrant, with over half of them stating that “vibrant” involved a sex toy or two. Because, hey, it can be hard to mix things up sometimes, especially after a few years together. And, the benefits of simply having a discussion surrounding sex toys with your partner extend well beyond the limits of sexual health as well. Bringing toys into a relationship improves communication, and makes it easier to give your partner directions. That’s especially true when you consider the idea of bringing a strap on into the mix. Depending on your relationship and which partner suggests it (or perhaps it’s a mutual decision) there are things you’ll want to know before getting into pegging. Never played with a pegging device before? Here’s our first timer’s guide to using a strap on for beginners, so you’re able to approach this new type of intimacy with the right attitude and information.

 

How to Have a Conversation About Pegging Toys

Whether you’re in a relationship with a man or a woman, and regardless of who starts the conversation, you always want to approach the topic of introducing sex toys with respect and open-mindedness. As you likely know your partner well, chances are that you’ll go into the conversation with a good idea of how they’ll react. It’s still important, however, to set the stage for a comfortable, relaxing conversation. Unless you know it’ll turn them on, don’t ask them about a pegging device while headed to a family dinner, or while out in public. Instead, create a safe, relaxing space where you can calmly explain your thoughts, and why you think it’d be a great addition to your sex life. Some tips for having this conversation include:

• Keeping the conversation fun
• Reassuring your partner that there’s nothing wrong with your sex life; you just want to make it even better
• Avoid mentioning anything negative
• Being open to hearing your partner’s real thoughts and opinions on the subject, even if they don’t agree with you

Again, chances are that you’ll already have a pretty good idea of what your partner’s response will be. However, it’s important to always be respectful and understanding when talking about sexual intimacy. If they seem open to the idea, it’s great to research some of the best pegging toys or strap on devices for beginners.

 

Different Types of Strap Ons

Now that you’ve had the (perhaps) dreaded conversation, it’s time to begin thinking about the best type of strap on for beginners like yourselves. It helps to understand what your options are, and how they even work. A strap on dildo is a replacement for a penis. However, that doesn’t mean that a man can’t also wear a strap on. Subverting gender roles might be a turn on for you as a couple. Simply enhancing play with a different style or size penis can be hot too, if that’s your thing. So, figure out what you’re looking for. If you’re in a female-female relationship, this might mean purchasing two different strap ons for you to use on each other. If you’re in a heterosexual relationship, it could mean finding a strap on that your male partner feels comfortable wearing.

But, let’s start with the basics. Strap ons all come with harnesses that have an O shaped opening where you thread the dildo through. Strap on harnesses tend to come in three styles. The Thong. As the name suggests, the harness wears similar to a thong, meaning the strap sits at your waist and goes between your butt cheeks. The Jockstrap. Again, the name is pretty self-explanatory here. This is sometimes more comfortable for men who will be wearing the device. Underwear. Instead of a strap, these look like boxers in most cases. You can wear them under your clothes, and just attach the dildo when you’re ready to play. What’s the best? There’s no real answer, as it depends on what you’re comfortable with.

 

Tips for Buying a Strap On for Beginners

If it’s at all possible, definitely shop for your strap on together as it’ll enhance feelings of intimacy, and ensure you’re both comfortable with the purchase decision (and excited for it to arrive). If it’s your first time buying a strap on for beginners, focus on comfort. Sure, that leather harness might look hot, but try to focus on how comfortable it will feel while you get a hang of the process of pegging. Brief-style harnesses are great for beginners because the underwear-style is comfy and generally easy to get used to. The next step will be to think about the size of the dildo that you’re going to want to use. Some harnesses are built for use with varying sizes, while others will only work with one size. Make sure you’ve got the right size so the dildo will fit.

If you’re a female, you can also think about adding on a vibrating stimulator device that will ensure you’re receiving clitoral stimulation and pleasure as you’re pegging, too. Make sure the fabric of your purchase is made from body-safe material. Not only should it be safe to wear on your body, but it should be comfortable as well. So, if you’ve got an allergy to cotton or something specific, double-check before buying your strap on. And, the final piece of advice we can offer is to purchase an insane amount of lube and use more than you think you’ll need. This goes for both vaginal and anal penetration. It’s just a nice precaution to take to ensure the pleasure and comfort of your partner.

 

Spicing Up Your Sex Life

Bringing toys into the bedroom is a great way to spice up your sex life. Having the best strap on for beginners can help take things from 0 to 100 really quickly. Having a conversation with your partner beforehand is key in gauging their interest and comfort levels. From there, you can move on to searching for the best toy that suits both of your needs and interests. If you find that a strap on isn’t for you just yet, browse our other best-selling adult sex toys.